Confidence: The Career Skill You Can’t Afford to Ignore
By Sophie Makonnen
The Confidence Gap: Why Competence Alone Isn’t Enough
“Confidence is something we underestimate the importance of. We treat it as a nice-to-have instead of a must-have. We place value on knowledge and resources above what we deem to be the soft skills of confidence." — Brittany Packnett Cunningham, Ted Talk: “How to Build your Confidence…and spark it in others”.
Joy Burnford, in Career Confidence and the Path to Leadership, highlights a persistent challenge in the workplace: confidence. Research by My Confidence Matters, which focused on workplace confidence, career development, and leadership, analyzed responses from nearly 2,500 professionals. The survey found that while 85% of women aspire to senior roles, 79% regularly struggle with confidence at work—a stark contrast to their male counterparts, whose confidence levels were 10–15% higher. However, only 65% of women said their organizations offer coaching or mentoring. Since coaching is often reserved for senior leaders, many emerging women leaders miss critical support.
As Katty Kay and Claire Shipman highlight in The Confidence Code and Sally Helgesen in How Women Rise, many of us—especially women—have been taught to believe that if we work hard, deliver excellent results, and avoid making a fuss, our contributions will naturally be recognized and rewarded. We fall into the trap of thinking that great work should speak for itself. But the reality is that competence and knowledge alone are not enough—confidence is just as critical to success. Kay and Shipman state that "success correlates more closely with confidence than with competence."
One thing that became clear throughout my professional life—whether in negotiations, leadership meetings, or career discussions—is that confidence opens doors that competence alone cannot. But what happens when you don’t feel confident? You push forward anyway—despite the uneasy sensations: the fear that speaking up will make you sound foolish or overly self-promotional, the anxiety that your success is unearned or simply a stroke of luck, and the discomfort of leaving your safe, familiar zone.
Or, sometimes, the discomfort wins. We choose safety over risk. We hold back, stay quiet, or decide not to pursue an opportunity—convinced it’s not ‘the right time.’ Not because we lacked competence. We couldn’t make that jump. It happens. It has happened to me. It’s part of the process.
And other times, I dared—and fell flat on my face. I kept going. With a bruised ego sometimes, I admit. And today, as I write this, I am smiling.
That doesn't mean you’re never scared or nervous. It doesn't mean doubt doesn't creep in sometimes. But you step forward because you have the expertise. You have the experience. You are prepared. You persist, even when it feels like you're moving against the tide. That is what makes the difference.
And sometimes, the only way to steady myself was to ‘fake it’—not in substance, but in presence—until confidence could catch up. And one of the most effective ways to steady myself? Work hard. Prepare. Over-prepare sometimes. Because preparation gives you something solid to stand on, even when doubt creeps in. And here comes the perfectionist—couldn’t resist, right !
Even very accomplished women have spoken openly about their struggles with confidence. A panel on CNN about empowering girls struck me when Michelle Obama admitted that she has often been confronted with self-doubt. And I remember catching Christine Lagarde’s talk at the International Women’s Day 2023 conference, where she said :
…..I am still short of confidence. I tell you. I remember discussing that with Angela Merkel, and she also told me she was short on confidence - which is why we generally over-prepare.
Michelle Obama, Christine Lagarde, and Angela Merkel… regardless of their backgrounds or politics, are accomplished and influential women who have made a significant impact on the global stage. And there they were, openly sharing their struggles with confidence. I was in good company! 😊
Perhaps they can speak about it so openly because they have reached a level of experience and success that offers them a certain comfort zone—a stage where they can acknowledge the self-doubt they experienced without threatening their place or credibility. And I am grateful for their willingness to share these insights. It reminds us that we are not alone.
And if women of their stature have felt this way, what does it tell us? It tells us that professional success isn't about never having self-doubt—it's about moving forward despite it.
The good news? Confidence isn't fixed. It's not something you either have or don't—it's something you build. And it grows with time, experience, and practice. The more you exercise it, the more it grows. From experience, I can share that confidence is like a muscle: to be strong, it must be challenged, stretched, and worked regularly. That is what all the sources I have shared with you also say. The uncomfortable zones slowly become comfortable.
Confidence Isn’t Just About You—It’s Also About How You’re Seen
We have a complex relationship with confidence. It is not a personal failure and certainly not all in your head.
As those I’ve referenced suggest, there’s another layer to this: confidence isn’t just about how we see ourselves but also how others perceive us. Confidence doesn’t exist in a vacuum. It is shaped by how the world sees—and values—us. When confidence is rewarded in some but question or discouraged in others, it’s no surprise that internal self-doubt follows. As Dr. Valerie Young notes in her book The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women, it’s hard to see yourself as fully competent when the world often fails to see you that way."
The feelings we experience often stem from confidence not being encouraged—or worse, from it being misinterpreted. Assertiveness can be perceived as arrogance, decisiveness as aggressiveness, and ambition as being pushy or overpowering. The further someone is from the prevailing leadership archetype, the more challenging it becomes to navigate these perceptions.
It’s no wonder that even those who have been encouraged and empowered still struggle with self-doubt.
This challenge permeates every professional sector, and international development is no exception. While the sector is built on principles of equity and inclusion, leadership structures often reflect traditional power dynamics.
Confidence: When the Workplace Reflects, Not Corrects
The international development sector is built on expertise, policy, and data, with a mission rooted in equity, justice, and inclusion. The latter values may not be popular in some spaces today, but I stand by them—and I will not shy away from saying so.
I learned in all my years working in international development that the sector's diversity does not mean there is inclusion and equity. When it comes to professional advancement, the sector often reproduces the same barriers and biases that exist in the world it seeks to change.
The very spaces that champion empowerment externally can undermine it internally—through who is heard, who leads, and whose confidence is rewarded or questioned.
Professionals—particularly women—find themselves navigating the same power structures that development programs claim to dismantle:
• Who gets to be seen as an expert?
• Whose leadership style is welcomed—and whose is dismissed?
• Who is invited to the table, and who has to fight to stay there?
So, where does that leave us? The reality may be complex, but waiting for it to change in the near future won’t move your career forward. The question is: What can professionals do to strengthen their confidence—especially in challenging environments?
Practical tips to build confidence
Build a Supportive Community. Surround yourself with people whose judgment you trust and who will tell you the truth. Confidence is much easier to build when you’re not doing it alone. Mentors, coaches, and trusted colleagues could provide support as long as there is someone who sees your strengths and helps you sharpen them.
Continue to Prepare and Excel in Your Field. There’s no substitute for expertise and preparation. Stay curious. Stay sharp. Master your craft. Knowledge builds authority—and authority fuels confidence.
Take Action Before You Feel Fully Ready. Confidence grows through action, not waiting. It’s not because you don’t feel ready that you aren’t. Discuss your hesitation with a colleague or mentor. And watch out for that inner critic—it’s not always helpful.
Shift Your Inner Dialogue. Replace self-doubt with action-oriented thinking. Instead of asking, “Am I ready?”, ask, “How can I contribute?” Sometimes, confidence isn’t about certainty—it’s about courage in the moment.
Use Competence as a confidence anchor. Own your expertise. You’ve worked hard to get where you are—let that reinforce your confidence. Competence is your foundation—return to it when doubt creeps in.
Command the Space You’re In. Confidence isn’t just what you say—it’s how you say it. Stand tall. Make eye contact. Speak clearly and with conviction. Presence is powerful—own yours.
In career growth, confidence is not optional. It’s not a nice-to-have—it’s a must-have. And like any other skill, confidence is a competence that can be developed—the good news is you don’t have to do it alone.
Building confidence requires more than reflection and awareness—it requires action and practice. Growth happens when you move outside your comfort zone, and taking action is essential.
So, don’t shy away from opportunities to put yourself out there—even when it feels scary, and the world is not always welcoming. With practice and time, it will get easier. And I promise, it’s worth it.