Emotions Are Data: Navigating Feelings for Empowered Leadership
By Sophie Makonnen
Introduction – Emotions Are Not the Enemy
Have you ever been told—directly or indirectly—to leave your emotions at the door when you come to work?
This expectation can feel especially contradictory in social impact spaces, where the mission is to drive change, reduce inequality, and uplift communities. Many of us enter this field because we care deeply. And yet, over time, we learn to downplay, suppress, or compartmentalize our emotions to appear "professional."
The unspoken message is clear: emotions are a liability. They cloud judgment, slow down progress, or make us appear less competent.
But here's the truth: emotions are not the problem. Unchecked reactivity might be—but the emotions themselves? They're data. They signal when something matters, such as when a boundary is crossed, an idea inspires us, or a system needs to change.
This is not an invitation to let emotions take over the workspace. Leadership grounded in emotional awareness does not mean unfiltered expression—like venting raw frustration, raising voices, or turning meetings into emotional outpourings. Instead, it's about recognizing the presence of emotions, understanding what they signal, and choosing how to respond with intention and respect.
In this blog, I want to offer a different lens. Instead of treating emotions as something to suppress or control, what if we treated them as information? What if we could respond rather than react? What if we used emotional awareness as a leadership strength, not a flaw?
You don't need to be endlessly composed or emotionally detached to lead effectively. But you do need clarity. And part of that clarity comes from listening to what your emotions are trying to tell you—and then using that insight wisely.
Let's explore how.
The Myth of "No Emotions at Work" ?
As indicated previously, somewhere along the way, many of us were taught that professionalism means keeping emotions out of the workplace. The idea is often subtle but persistent: to be effective, you need to be rational, composed, and unaffected by the emotional weight of your work.
This belief can also feel deeply ingrained in social impact spaces, where the work carries high stakes for communities and their futures and decisions can affect entire populations. It's as if the gravity of the mission demands a kind of emotional neutrality. But the reality is that emotions are always present, no matter how much we try to compartmentalize. They influence how we think, interact, and make decisions.
The expectation of being "objective" or "unemotional" often stems from organizational cultures shaped by traditional power structures—where showing emotion has been equated with weakness or seen as a distraction from results. But let's pause here: can we separate our humanity from our work, especially when that work is deeply tied to human well-being?
Ignoring emotions doesn't make them go away. It only pushes them underground, where they often show up in other ways—burnout, disengagement, frustration, or a sense of disconnection from the very mission we care about.
Acknowledging emotions doesn't mean we abandon professionalism. It means we recognize that emotions are part of how we understand the world around us. They alert us when something feels off, values are being challenged, or energy is aligned and flowing.
Professionalism isn't about emotional suppression—it's about emotional awareness. The myth that emotions have no place at work keeps us from fully engaging with the complexity of our roles. When we embrace emotions as a source of insight, we can lead with more clarity, resilience, and authenticity.
Speaking Up with Emotional Intelligence
There's a misconception that we must be forceful, loud, or confrontational to challenge the status quo or advocate for what matters. But leadership doesn't always require raising your voice or dominating the room. Some of the most effective moments come from subtle, intentional actions—like a well-placed question, a pause that shifts the energy, or a calm but clear statement that reframes the conversation. This isn't about ignoring emotions—it's about integrating them.
This is where Emotional intelligence comes in. Emotional intelligence is the ability to recognize, understand, and manage one's own emotions and to recognize, understand, and respond to the emotions of others. It's about being aware of what you're feeling, how it's influencing you, and how you can use that awareness to engage with others more effectively.
Emotional intelligence helps you stay grounded so you can respond with clarity and intention, even when the stakes are high. Over time, developing this emotional awareness also helps us build confidence—it reinforces our ability to trust our judgment, even in complex or high-pressure moments.
But it’s not just our own inner world that shapes what we feel—our roles at work influence which emotions surface, and how we’re expected to handle them.
How Roles Shape Emotions at Work
We often think of emotions as personal, something that comes from inside us, shaped by our history or personality. But the roles we play at work also influence how we feel. Expectations from others, whether spoken or not, can shape which emotions seem “acceptable” in different positions.
For example, in leadership roles, we might feel pressure to stay calm and composed, even when things are chaotic. Meanwhile, more junior staff might feel they’re not “allowed” to show confidence, or that they have to carry frustration silently. Over time, this can lead to emotional strain—not because we’re too emotional, but because we’re navigating invisible rules about what’s okay to feel, and what’s not.
Understanding that emotions are shaped by roles helps us take a more compassionate view of ourselves and others. It also helps emerging leaders notice when their emotions reflect not just their inner world but the expectations of their position. Emotions are seldom ours alone. What we feel at work has as much to do with what we are doing, and what others expect of people in our roles, as it does with our own inner lives as indicated by Gianpiero Petriglieri.
When we recognize this, we can begin to ask: Are these feelings truly mine—or are they part of the role I’m in? That awareness can open the door to more thoughtful leadership.
Emotions as Data: Tools for Awareness and Strategy
We often think of emotions as something that needs to be managed or, in some cases, avoided altogether. But what if we saw emotions as information? As signals that can guide our choices, alert us to what matters, and help us lead with more intention?
Emotions are not random. They arise in response to our environment, values, desires, dreams, experiences, and places where we feel hopeful, challenged, or vulnerable. Our goals and aspirations can also stir them.
Consider anger or frustration that emerges when you feel overlooked, or when your ideas are not acknowledged. That emotion might not just be about the moment itself; it might reflect a more profound need to be seen, respected, or aligned with your aspirations for growth. The emotion isn't the issue. The risk lies in reacting without reflection, letting the feeling take over, rather than letting it guide thoughtful action.
Here's a simple approach to working with emotions as data:
• Notice what you're feeling. Pause and name the emotion—anger, frustration, excitement, disappointment.
• Write it down if that helps create some distance. Putting words to emotions can slow down the rush to react.
• Ask: What triggered this feeling? What does this tell me about what I value, what I need, or where I feel exposed or hopeful?
• Consider: Is this touching on a goal or aspiration I have? A need for respect, fairness, or visibility?
• Then ask: What needs to be said? What needs to be planned? Not every emotion requires immediate action, but most offer something to reflect on.
When we treat emotions as information, we give ourselves space to respond with clarity rather than react out of habit. This is especially important in complex, high-stakes environments where decisions can have far-reaching impacts. Emotional awareness helps us stay connected to what matters—both to ourselves and to the communities we serve—while still navigating the demands of our roles.
Emotions are not distractions. They are signals. And when we listen, they can become tools for wiser, more grounded leadership.
This became very real for me when I faced ongoing frustration at work. I once worked with a colleague who constantly undermined my role, spreading confusion, challenging my authority, and trying to position themselves as the one in charge. At first, I questioned myself. Was I being too emotional? Too sensitive? Was my ego too big? But over time, the frustration I felt became data. It told me something was truly off, not just for me, but for others on the team who felt the same strain. This wasn’t about reacting quickly but letting emotions prompt me to look deeper, understand the dynamics at play, and act with intention. It wasn’t about acting on impulse or emotion. It was about trying to understand other perspectives, having conversations, and resolving things directly. But the pattern didn’t change; it wasn’t just my issue. Clients and staff were also raising concerns. Instead of reacting, I started observing. I took a step back—I went on the balcony. Through persistence and strategy, I addressed the issue in a way that resolved the situation and strengthened my confidence as a leader. It showed me that emotions—my own and those around me—could be used as valuable information, not something to avoid. They became a guide for thoughtful action.
Leading with awareness
There are times when we can stop and reflect, and times when we need to keep moving, even when things feel heavy. Emotional awareness doesn’t mean we can’t function—it means we bring more intention to how we move forward.Sometimes, staying grounded means listening to what emotions are telling us. Other times, it means setting them aside for now and returning to them later with fresh perspective.
Emotions are important. They are data. They tell us when something matters, when something's off, or when we need to pay closer attention. But they are not the whole story. Emotional awareness means noticing what you feel—using that insight to guide your next step—but not letting it take over. And like any skill, the more you practice this kind of awareness, the more it strengthens your confidence—confidence in your ability to navigate complexity, trust your instincts, and make choices that reflect both what you know and what matters most, in that moment, with the information you have.
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